I’ve been thinking a lot about butterflies and chrysalises and what it means to emerge. (Yes, more metaphors!!) Recently, I attended my first networking event (gulp!) in a long while: the “Emerging Women Power Party” (double gulp!). I went to meet my business mentor, Jennifer Lee, and hear her speak. It was wonderful to meet her and to listen to her speech, AND I got much more than I was expecting.
Click on the link above for the video of the Emerging Women Power Party in San Francisco. Each part is worth watching (I received so much from each speaker) and worth a blog post of its own. For today’s post, however, you will want to pay special attention to Sara Beak’s talk, which begins around the 50-minute mark. She speaks about emerging, about going into her “red tent” (her version of a chrysalis), and about the trials and tribulations that followed once she emerged from that tent and went public with her own truth. Her story describes the painful experience of having someone she loves and trusts tell her not to speak her truth, to stand down and be quiet.
Let’s face it: the road to emerging can be rough, it can be beautiful and transcendent, illuminating and joyful, and also daunting and challenging. As a response to my last post, someone wrote to me and said she has often felt there was a cost that came with being truly authentic. She wondered if I felt the same way. The answer I gave her was, Yes, absolutely. Further, the cost of NOT being authentic—of living my life according to what others think or want instead of according to my own soul’s truth—is much higher. As Sara Beak so poignantly puts it, the cost of following external rather than internal guidance is nothing less than our souls.
So what does it take to emerge? To truly connect deeply to my own soul, to what I believe is my own connection to the Divine/God/Source? Well, I need a chrysalis.
Good ol’ Merriam-Webster! Doesn’t that sound good? A protective covering. I definitely have needed that during this process of transforming myself from someone who follows others to someone who follows her own guidance, her own soul. This transformation also means wading into my own vulnerability, and my chrysalis allows me to hold that part of myself with gentleness and compassion. My new, wet, untried wings need the time and space to grow and become strong.
So what does my chrysalis look like? The picture of the hands and the sun gives you a clue. My chrysalis is a place where I am supported fully, a place where I feel safe to make my own choices and follow my own path. In my chrysalis I make time to connect with myself and the Divine, to open to my own soul. I have created my chrysalis by hiring my own coach (the wonderful BJ Levy), creating relationships that sustain my soul, and giving myself the time and space to breathe and connect within.
Easy-peasy, right? Hell, no! Sometimes it takes all my strength to cocoon for transformation, to say “no” to others so that I can say “yes” to myself, to get through my fear of what may be on the other side, and that is why I don’t go it alone. And at the end of the day, the most important part of my chrysalis, what helps me emerge, is my connection and acceptance of who I am — the foundation I stand on is me, my own soul and inner guidance.
So: what is your chrysalis?
Want to connect with me about creating your own chrysalis? Click here for a free 30-minute consultation.